May 2010
1 post
“Above all is loyalty…because with loyalty comes love…and with love...”
April 2010
5 posts
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his...”
– John 15:13
What happens when Im not there...
…is unspeakable.
It just makes my blood absolutely boil..to know what some do and to know they get away with it…free to do it again. Free to do w.e they please because they know that I have my hands tied…tied because of a gay school where every little shit roams scot free from their miserable and dispicable acts.
But just as others before them…they will not walk for what...
Akcent - How Deep Is Your Love
Gotta play it...
Justin Bieber is a legit reason to unfollow even...
lickystickypickyme:
seriously….
The silence isn’t so bad, Till I look at my...
March 2010
14 posts
A New Dawn
Theres really no way to describe how much anger..rage..sadness Im feeling right now. I thought that I had heard it all before..that there was nothing that could provoke emotion from me. But this….this is beyond anything I can comprehend.
In such a state its easy to seek revenge..the kind of revenge that draws blood and confessions. But that kind of revenge has no place here and I know...
“Love all thy neighbor…
but trust none of them but One…
and for...”
God i love it when i find old music in my library
Just One of Those Days
Yea my day was pretty normal for wats its been like the past weekish. I wasnt as tired as usual which was really really niiice. Of course it only took Ali to loudly exclaim “JAUNDICE BROOOO” noticing my eyes were in fact yellllow. Other passerbys couldnt help but notice my face had the same deal….which was cool…..
Apparently thats a big deal medically so I cruised over to...
Valuableee Lesson
So were finishing dinner and my dad is ranting to my sister bout cleaning the dishes while Im collapsed on the couch sick as a dog. Listening…I hear him ask her, “Do you know what the 5 P’s are? Your defintely gonna need to eventually in the military.”
Proper
Planning
Prevents
Piss-Poor
Preformance
So as I lied there I naturally went, “…..Dad thats...
(via established1993)
jammmmin songgg
February 2010
6 posts
Progress
Yesterday, regardless of being the 21st…i actually went an entire day without thinking about her (unconciously i guess…doing it conciously would me that I was in fact thinking)…not her name..nothing…one day in all of this time…progress…
I woke up 2day and then thot about it and surprised even myself…I can feel myself riggiling free…such...
“And in the free fall I will realize I’m better off when I hit the bottom”
– (via halfpastfour) (via sophisticated-simplicities) (via williemes) (via established1993)
“Each time we don’t say what we want to say we’re dying. Make a list of how many...”
– Yoko Ono’s Twitter (She finally got one right) (via established1993)
All the Right Reasons
It is simply a given that people at school have and will come up to him and ask him in an arrogant tone, why the hell are you going into the army? His answer is not a conventional one, it never will be. “To put on a show” he says in a solemn tone, adding a small smile to it at the end. As it so happens, this is response one of the rare times in his life that he is not 100% literal. So...
Craziest sounds Ive ever heard. take a listen and...
Defiance
Easily one of my favorite words in the English language. easily. not just because it sounds cool. no, just like with many other things in this world, this word carries much more meaning to me than for most people. It can be as everyone sees it, both good and bad..defiance against the state, against an oppressive government, or defiance against authority, more as an act of rebellion.
In more...
January 2010
4 posts
An Oath and Two Cents
After reading this over two months ago..I immediately took on this quote as an oath..an oath to serve as the foundation for how I was to react to the events in my life to come. Today it holds true evermore..but I have added my own two cents to the seemingly perfect oath that I see it as:
To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence...
All of the words said. All of the thoughts,...
December 2009
10 posts
A Revelation
Believe it or not, yes I have received a revelation. It is rather simple…learned the hard way as always, but nevertheless…simple.
I used to run, to run and hide and run again. I would always run. From everything and everyone except one. I was reknowned for wiggilying out of a tight spot. I came to understand it was what I did best..probably because it was sooooo easy. Who wouldnt be...
Descending hours
In these descending hours I will not sleep. I will not dream.L
In these hours left I will pull whatever I have left to get myself in the door of that lobby.o
In these last hours I will think of nothing but what is to come.v
In these final moments I will see nothing but the smile on the one face that I would give anything to see.e
In these last hours I will pray one last time for mercy to come...
In These Times...
Today I have become someone different in many regards, but so many things about me have remained the same still. I am offically a BU Terrier as of today, joining the class of 2014 in the fall. That is a new identity. Today I have also been giving my battalion assignment, the Charles River Battalion, another identity that stands above the rest, one I hold with the highest honor. “You are...
unspeakable uncertainty
With silence comes doubt. And with that doubt soon comes fear. And with that fear comes pain…
Last night I had good dreams..all of them. I kept waking up only to close my eyes and to see a smile. To see her wearing the new promise and for nothing but happiness to reign. To hear nothing but that unmistakeable laughter and a voice I havent heard in so long, full with nothing but joy. It...
I Just Want to Sleep
I just want to go to sleep. To sleep for the next week and wake up and get on my flight in the morning. Sleep has always been the best way to pass time. And at the sound of waiting another week, sleep is something I desperately need. I just want to close me eyes and not feel anything. Just stare at the darkness of the back of my eyes and let a week pass by me.
I dont want to dream. I dont want to...
A Role Model
I have almost died.. once.
It was a selfless act that almost killed me. I went into the water after my father with the hopes that I could help in someway…keep him above the water for alittle while longer, maybe even back to shore safely. I remember the feeling, or the lack thereof I should say. I didnt feel anything. I didnt think or contimplate the risks, even for a second. I just reacted...
I Remember
I remember our car pulling in front of the log house. I remember there were atleast 6 other cars in the “driveway” in front of this house. I was so anxious I remember the feeling so well. I remember running straight up to the door of the house and banging on the door. Someone soon came to answer that I didnt recognize. She isnt Rachael I remember thinking to myself. Hm. “Im sorry...
I am.
I am human.
I am still clutching to my phone, praying that it will ring.
I am afraid.
I am not afraid to admit that.
I am sitting in a silence that I cannot bear to continue.
I am without the only thing that truly matters to me.
I am counting down the days.
I am determined to earn a second chance by whatever means necessary.
I am going to keep my promises. all of my promises.
I am a...
Listen
November 2009
7 posts
Go ahead. Press the play button.
Awaiting Judgement...
One of the hardest things I have ever had to do in life…this is not the first time..i guess thats not surprising based on the kind of life Ive been leading up until the past week. It is something that I have no say in..no control over. I never know the end result no matter how much I think the know the person..or the group of people. All these variables..these unknowns are what make it the...
Coming to Terms
Of late I cant help but notice myself coming to terms with everything I never thought Id have to. It seems that there is no part of my life that has not been revealed or uncovered. All the weight that I have managed to hold on my shoulders for the past month is slowly being lifted one by one.
I am now disconnected to the outside world and everyone in it. It seems that this new silence that has...
3 Days In July...
Why would this be my title, my name in a blog? Its only three days. Big ass deal. To what purpose in my life can they possible serve? A question I asked myself all too often not long ago. After all, its only three days…72 hours…4320 minutes. It seemed like a pretty legit question to me. Simply for the sake of blogging, sharing ideas with others, thoughts and feelings as well, I think...